Wednesday, February 10, 2010

32 weeks.

I'm feeling sorry for myself today.  Thankfully these days don't come as often as they used to.  It's hard as I think about how I would have been 32 weeks pregnant today with my little Michael.  But I'm not, and I have accepted that.  Yet, I still can't help but feel sorry at times.

After having this experience, my eyes have been open to just how many people are hurting, struggling and suffering.

Yesterday I shed tears of joy as I read about how little Bronson had made a complete turnaround.  I had fasted and prayed (along with hundreds of others) that his parents would never have to experience the pain that comes along with losing a child.

I also find myself praying each night for the Norton family, that they will be comforted and peace will be brought to their hearts after losing their little baby Gavin.

My thoughts have been turned to baby Aaron's family this week, and how sweet that one hour they had with their little boy must have been.  They were most definitely in the midst of an angel.

Lastly, I am praying for the Tenney family that they might have strength to make it through as their baby isn't expected to survive the pregnancy (just like our little Michael).  I'm also praying for a miracle.

It's amazing how these heart breaking and life altering experiences make us stronger.  They are things we never thought we would be able to live through and yet we do.  Life goes on and it is good.  We start to realize all of our numerous blessings and resolve to never take them for granted.  Ever again.


  1. While we lost our last baby at only 7 weeks gestation and I imagine it grows infinitely more painful with each passing week of pregnancy you'd completed, I feel for you here! It seems like I've had a hundred friends announce pregnancies since our miscarriage, and while I want to be happy for everyone, it's overwhelming, too. It's so helpful to me to read about and pray for others who understand the loss as well as the joy. I love your blog, thank you for the comfort it brings!

  2. It's OK to feel sorry for yourself every now and then. I lost my Teddy at 21 weeks. At that point in the game, you're making so many plans. You can 'see' your family doing all the joyous things that families do. I still feel sorry for myself at times - even now...6 years and two incredible kids later. But I also feel joy that my child wasn't born into a life of hospitals and hardship. And even though he doesn't sit at the table with us, or run around and play games with us, he's still a part of our family. Just like Michael will always be a part of yours. I'm sorry for your pain, but thank you for sharing your story.


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