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Article Featured on Inspiring Women Who Know

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A Mother's Heart: Be Still, and Know Written: Apr 27, 2019 by Hilary Craner There is a quote from Sister Sheri L. Dew that says, “A woman led by the Lord knows where to turn for answers and for peace. She can make difficult decisions and face problems with confidence because she takes her counsel from the Spirit.”  A little over 9 years ago I sat in a small room at Primary Children’s Hospital with my husband, a social worker and our unborn son’s Perinatologist. I was 21 weeks pregnant at the time. We listened to the doctor tell us that our son not only had an extremely rare heart condition (known as Ebstein’s Anomaly) but that it was the most severe case he had ever seen. He went on to tell us that our son would probably not make it to full gestation and even if he did, he wouldn’t live any more than a few minutes after he was born. I felt numb and I fought back the tears that were stinging my eyes. Images from the last week of ultrasounds of our son’s beating oversized heart, thou...
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Wishing you a hope filled Christmas!

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This December our family had the opportunity to dress up as shepherds and participate in our ward's live nativity (see the photo on our Christmas card 😊).   As a family, we retold their story as if it were our own. We told about the angel who visited us and told us "no to be scared" (in our little Molly's words) and how they brought good tidings of great joy. We recounted how desperately we searched for the newborn babe through the night and about the peace and love we felt in His presence.  One of Caleb's lines was "We felt we needed to tell everyone we knew, so this is why we are telling you these things." While all of this was simply an act, we truly do feel the desire to share our testimonies of our Savior and the love and peace He brings into each of our lives.  We know that " because of Him every one of us has hope of a glorious future. Because of Him, we can have clean slates, second chances, new beginnings. Because of Him, everything is pos...
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A Letter to Myself in the Thick of Young Motherhood

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On my run this morning I saw a young, pregnant mother pushing a stroller to the pond so that her toddler could see the ducks. Instantly I thought back on when I was that mom. It was a time of diaper bags, strollers, car seats, no sleep, stress about potty training, worries about milestones and eating habits, no sleep, diaper rashes, park adventures, library visits and did I mention no sleep? Like, zero sleep. I remember seeing women (like me today), on a run with no kids and thinking how amazing that would be (well minus, the run part... I wasn't all that into running at the time). What I wouldn't have given to have a few hours a few times a week all to myself. Or to have a child old enough to babysit so that I could run errands without having to buckle and unbuckle kids a hundred times. Today as I noticed this young mom, I remembered how hard that stage of life was and wished I could talk to my former self. If I could this is what I would say: Hi there. You don't know me y...
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Bask in the Light

Last weekend, my husband and I spent just under 24 hours in Salt Lake city as a fun little getaway for our 14 year anniversary. As part of that getaway, we wanted to do some sealings in the Salt Lake Temple. Saturday morning we got up, went to breakfast and walked across the street to the temple. Inside the temple there were a lot of people! We had expected it to be busy seeing how it was a Saturday in August (the prime wedding month) and the fact that this particular temple will be closing soon for a long and extensive renovation. As we made our way to the sealing rooms we were transferred from one room to the next as we waited for enough witnesses to join our group. Soon, the temple coordinator came into our room and announced "It looks like we will be putting you down in room 6, below the temple." With it being just my second visit to this particular temple I wasn't immediately aware of the significance of this move. Others in our group, however, showed their excitem...
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The Sacred and Transforming Weight of Motherhood

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I recently read an article on ChurchofJesusChrist.org titled " A Sacred Weight ". In it, the author described two different kinds of weight that we feel as mothers. I haven't been able to stop thinking about these weights and how they mold and shape us in our lives. Allow me to try and articulate the thoughts that have been running around in my mind since reading this enlightening article. The first weight I have been thinking about is the actual physical feeling and presence of our children. For me, this weight started when my children were in the womb. I had average to large sized babies and by the end of each pregnancy I was REALLY feeling the weight. Soon after they were born, the weight shifted from my belly to my arms and chest. It was the greatest feeling in the world even during those long, sleepless nights. The physical weight can also be a toddler on our laps, a child's head resting on our shoulder or a the subtle weight of a hand clasped in our own. Ph...
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I cried.

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Due to recent events in New York and their change to the abortion law that now legalizes late term abortions after 24 weeks, I have felt the need to share my story. The more I think about this post, the more I realize that it isn't so much my story as it is my son, Michael's, story. I just hope that I can do it justice for him.   I didn’t hear the shocking news until Wednesday this week (a whole 24 hours after the announcement was made). As I watched videos of people cheering and crying tears of happiness and New York lighting up buildings with pink, I couldn’t help but shed tears of heartache. I cried. I cried, and I haven't stopped crying about it each time it comes to my mind or shows up the news.  As I cried, I was immediately taken back to 9 years ago when I sat in a small room at Primary Children’s Hospital with my husband, a social worker and our unborn son’s Perinatologist. As we sat and listened to the doctor tell us about our son’s extreme heart...
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If I could, I would tell her everything was going to be alright.

{song credit: "Smallest Wingless" by Craig Cardiff} My heart has been full these past few days as my thoughts have been turned toward my son, Michael. It all started when we were watching some random home videos the other day, and a video of Michael's burial popped up in the feed. As we watched the video, I saw a mother whose heart was shattered. I could feel that broken heart as if it was currently beating within my chest, not because my heart is broken now, but because I was that mother and the memory of the pain is very real and very raw. I remember distinctly how I felt on that day nearly 8 years ago. I was hurting and crippled with sorrow. I was only able to stand because my loving Heavenly Father had sent angels to hold me up. I yearned to hold my sweet baby in my arms. That's where he should have been. In my arms. Not in a cold, tiny casket. I wasn't bitter. I wasn't mad. But I was broken. It was an odd feeling looking at this mother who I knew al...
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