Sunday, September 28, 2008

I am a woman.

Last night, my church held it's annual General Relief Society Broadcast. For those of you who don't know, I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. "The Relief Society is the largest and greatest woman organization on earth. It was divinely ordained by God to help women: 1. increase faith, 2. strengthen family and homes, and 3. serve the Lord and his children." (Sister Julie B. Beck)

I am so grateful to be a woman in this church. I was reminded, while listening to the inspired talks, that to be a woman is a wonderful and divine calling. I have been having thoughts and feelings of inadequacy lately... in fact I think I have been having thoughts and feelings of inadequacy for most of my life! It is just part of being a woman I suppose. However, President Uchtdorf must have known about my struggles and reminded me that I should focus on the things that I have accomplished, and not worry about the things that didn't work out exactly the way I wanted them to. He also told me to not let fear of failure discourage me, and more important to not let the voice of critics paralyze me (especially if that voice is coming from within)... major guilty on that one!

Elder Uchtdorf also spoke to the women of the church and told us that we should create beautiful things which will "bring deep satisfaction and fulfillment". This was a very interesting point to me. He basically told us that if we beautify our surroundings, we will be happy. I couldn't help but think about earlier that day and how I had spent the day deep cleaning (my mom is coming into town... you know how it is...). I had thought about how much better I felt to truly have a clean home... not just one that looked clean! I also realized that I had a deep feeling of satisfaction and fulfillment. Elder Uchtdorf was right (really not all that surprising though, is it?)!

Anyway, I loved the conference. I always feel a renewed sense of gratefulness to be a woman when I leave those meetings. I feel for those women who are out there trying to be something they are not. I am so grateful to be a wife to a wonderful husband and a mother to a hilarious kid. During the hum drum of everyday life I'll be honest that I don't always get that feeling of satisfaction and fulfillment. However, if I think about that day while laying in bed at night, and think about how I was able to get my little boy to walk to me and be there to see his very first steps or think about how I was able to get the house all picked up and dinner on the table before my husband came home (even if it was just Mac and Cheese)... I have a sense of fulfillment for that one day.

Sorry for the novel.  This isn't to force my beliefs down your throat, it is really just for me to record some of the notes I took so that I can later look back on what I learned and be reminded!

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